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In 2024, customs enforcement teams at Istanbul Airport found this baby gorilla in a small crate. She was being smuggled from Nigeria to Bangkok.

https://redd.it/1vkwdbd
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2
I Was Asked to Monitor Employee Productivity. I Wasn't Told to Exclude Management.

I once worked as the IT guy for an HR company where the founder and president became convinced that the sales call center was wasting too much time on the internet.

These were already the lowest-paid people in the company, but apparently the solution to that problem was finding reasons to pay them even less.

In order not to single out any one department, he wanted browser history reporting on everyone in the company so managers and HR could review it during weekly performance meetings.

So I complied.

I wrote a scheduled task that scraped browser history from every Windows machine on the company domain, stored it centrally, and fed it into a management portal along with the employees information.

The first reports came in.

The call center employees were... surprisingly boring.

Sure, there was Facebook, YouTube, Amazon, and the occasional person apparently conducting extensive research into things that definitely weren't part of their job.

But overall, they were pretty tame.

Then HR started looking at everyone else's reports.

That's when things got interesting.

The browsing history of the founder, owner, and president was absolutely spectacular.

So much porn. Like, this man has a sickness level.

And while I wasn't particularly surprised, I had worked on his home computer before and already knew about his rather enthusiastic browsing habits, I had never expected to see it neatly categorized in the same productivity dashboard he'd demanded for his employees.

A few days later, HR asked me if I could exclude certain people from the reports.

I asked who.

They gave me a list.

The president was at the top.

Funny how quickly the company's commitment to objective productivity metrics disappeared when the metrics became objective.

https://redd.it/1vl02jq
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