This media is not supported in your browser
VIEW IN TELEGRAM
π15π9π7π¨4π³3π1
Forwarded from Deranged Posting (SNEED)
π Ze Manifesto of Ze Future Automobile
By Klaus βBMWβ Schwab, Chief Dipstick Removal Officer
Chapter 1 β Ze End of Ownership
U vill not own ze dipstick.
U vill not own ze car.
U vill lease, subscribe, und finance forever.
Freedom is inefficient. Happiness is mandatory.
Chapter 2 β Ze Oil Sensor Doctrine
In ze old vorld, u pulled out a dirty metal stick.
In ze new vorld, ze sensor vill fail, und u vill go to ze dealer.
U vill clap as u pay β¬399 for ze βoil level recalibration ritual.β
Chapter 3 β Ze Buttonless Paradise
Buttons are relics of ze past.
U vill touch ze screen, even to open ze glovebox.
If ze screen freezes, u vill reboot ze car like a Windows Vista laptop.
Chapter 4 β Ze Subscription PlΓ€n
Heated seats are no longer free.
β¬19.99 per month for ze warm cheeks.
β¬9.99 per month for ze bright headlights.
β¬4.99 per month for ze horn.
Chapter 5 β Ze Engine of Tomorrow
Ze belt vill run in ze ΓΆl.
Ze chain vill rattle like ze bones of your ancestors.
Und if it breaks, ze piston vill shake hands mit ze valve.
Progress has a price. Und zat price is β¬7,499.
Chapter 6 β Ze Customer Experience
U vill sit in ze dealership for 4 hours.
U vill drink bad coffee.
U vill leave β¬2,000 poorer.
Und u vill say, βDanke, BMW.β
Final Chapter β Ze Happiness Directive
U vill not question.
U vill not resist.
U vill drive ze Ultimate Leasing Machineβ’.
Und u vill be happy.
By Klaus βBMWβ Schwab, Chief Dipstick Removal Officer
Chapter 1 β Ze End of Ownership
U vill not own ze dipstick.
U vill not own ze car.
U vill lease, subscribe, und finance forever.
Freedom is inefficient. Happiness is mandatory.
Chapter 2 β Ze Oil Sensor Doctrine
In ze old vorld, u pulled out a dirty metal stick.
In ze new vorld, ze sensor vill fail, und u vill go to ze dealer.
U vill clap as u pay β¬399 for ze βoil level recalibration ritual.β
Chapter 3 β Ze Buttonless Paradise
Buttons are relics of ze past.
U vill touch ze screen, even to open ze glovebox.
If ze screen freezes, u vill reboot ze car like a Windows Vista laptop.
Chapter 4 β Ze Subscription PlΓ€n
Heated seats are no longer free.
β¬19.99 per month for ze warm cheeks.
β¬9.99 per month for ze bright headlights.
β¬4.99 per month for ze horn.
Chapter 5 β Ze Engine of Tomorrow
Ze belt vill run in ze ΓΆl.
Ze chain vill rattle like ze bones of your ancestors.
Und if it breaks, ze piston vill shake hands mit ze valve.
Progress has a price. Und zat price is β¬7,499.
Chapter 6 β Ze Customer Experience
U vill sit in ze dealership for 4 hours.
U vill drink bad coffee.
U vill leave β¬2,000 poorer.
Und u vill say, βDanke, BMW.β
Final Chapter β Ze Happiness Directive
U vill not question.
U vill not resist.
U vill drive ze Ultimate Leasing Machineβ’.
Und u vill be happy.
π4π2
Forwarded from Deranged Posting (7\)
This media is not supported in your browser
VIEW IN TELEGRAM
π₯°29
Supposed Dallas ICE shooter with more gay liberal buzzwords scribbled on the casings.
>aim for ICE agents
>murks beaners instead
>"oops" *guessilldieshruggingstockphoto.jpg*
>aim for ICE agents
>murks beaners instead
>"oops" *guessilldieshruggingstockphoto.jpg*
π€£26π€·2π€‘1
This media is not supported in your browser
VIEW IN TELEGRAM
π₯°26π€£10β€2π1
Forwarded from Slavtards (Gastarbeiter)
This media is not supported in your browser
VIEW IN TELEGRAM
π24